Continued Improvement

Wayne continues to improve from the effects the brain mass is causing in his body. I say it that way because the cancer is not improving. It continues its steady march. But the symptoms that Wayne has to deal with are improving as he learns how to retrain his brain, bringing other areas in to make up for the areas that are no longer functioning.

The brain is a fascinating thing. It is so specialized in its function. Wayne's brain does not know it has a left side. There is nothing wrong with his left leg or his left hand, but his brain is not sending the signals to activate them, so it is as if his left hand and leg were damaged. However, through physical therapy, he is learning how to compensate. He has to consciously remember that he has a left side and he has to deliberately think about where that left leg should be or how the left hand should work. Slowly, other parts of his brain are taking up the slack and his left side is starting to work without quite so much effort on his part. He can now walk very well with his walker, but he will forget which direction to turn to get where he is going. He can even walk without the walker by holding on to walls and furniture (this for balance more than for strength), but the reason he walks without the walker is because he forgets he needs it.

Some parts of his brain are working well, and others are not. Right now he is on the phone having a discussion with the insurance company. He is perfectly cogent and knows all the intricacies of his insurance coverage and is making reasoned statements. But he probably will forget or misremember anything that has to do with numbers or dates. He is likely to remember the name of whomever he spoke with, but might forget what she told him.

Right now, he is pretty mobile and much more independent than he has been for several weeks. We are in a good time... probably a reprieve before the next effects begin. We are enjoying this day and not worrying about what the next day will bring. This kind of living is what Jesus had in mind when He said, "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own" (Matt 6:34). How silly to add tomorrow's issues to today's activity. How wasteful to miss the pleasure of today because tomorrow might have new challenges in it. We have learned that when the trouble arrives, the grace to deal with it comes along with it. When you worry about it and anticipate it, the grace to handle it is missing. But when it comes, then comes strength. Grace meets you where you stand.

"This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it"(Ps 118:24). This day. This very day. God has made it-- He has scheduled it and arranged it and fit it together hour by hour and minute by minute. I will rejoice in THIS day and in every detail God has placed into it.