Sleep in Heavenly Peace
Wayne died peacefully at 1:00 pm. Brantley and I were with him. It seemed right that our 26+ year marriage would end with us sharing that last intimacy. Stinson and Kennedy came to the room just as he had taken his last breath.
Earlier in his illness, Wayne and I had time to muse on what the experience of dying might be like. We agreed it must be like a birth. Imagine a liitle baby in the womb. It's the only world he knows. His universe is small and dark, but he doesn't know that. Those of us out here in the big world think, "How crowded you must be. Why, your world can barely hold you! Every move you make leads you to boundaries. I'm sure you must be eager to come out into light and air." But the little baby-- he thinks he is in light and air. How amazed he must be when he pushes through the birth canal and encounters the big world.
Here on planet earth, we think we know Light and Air, but we only know the outside edges, a little caricature. How amazed we will be when we push through that eternal birth canal and find LIFE.
December 13, 2005. Wayne Dean was born.
Earlier in his illness, Wayne and I had time to muse on what the experience of dying might be like. We agreed it must be like a birth. Imagine a liitle baby in the womb. It's the only world he knows. His universe is small and dark, but he doesn't know that. Those of us out here in the big world think, "How crowded you must be. Why, your world can barely hold you! Every move you make leads you to boundaries. I'm sure you must be eager to come out into light and air." But the little baby-- he thinks he is in light and air. How amazed he must be when he pushes through the birth canal and encounters the big world.
Here on planet earth, we think we know Light and Air, but we only know the outside edges, a little caricature. How amazed we will be when we push through that eternal birth canal and find LIFE.
December 13, 2005. Wayne Dean was born.
posted by Jennifer Kennedy Dean at 1:07 PM
53 Comments:
Bless you all.
Marilyn
Missouri Baptist Children's Home
Jennifer......hearts all over this world cry with yours today. Yes, Wayne is in the BEST place but our human hearts hurt with the loss. Your coming days will be filled with memories and friends and family. Even though we can't be there with you; know that we continue to sit in spirit with all the love we can send your way.
Jeanne & Dale
I just had a thought - I can only imagine the celebration in Heaven today when Wayne Dean came home....all the scuttle of the past days is over and that mansion is sparkling with all the gold and silver and pure white - everything is pristine and all that hoopla was just for Wayne. Isn't that just like our God!
Jeanne
You and your family continue to be in our prayers. May you feel God's arms around you, holding you and carrying you through.
Sherry Arni
Blessing to you and your family. We will all miss Wayne and his wonderful character. Thanks for taking the time to share his last few days wiht us. We will continue to pray for you as you travel a new road.
Terry Lamberth, DOM, Clay-Platte Baptist Association
JENNIFER MY HEART ACHE FOR YOU TODAY I KNOW JESUS IS HOLDING YOUR HAND AND YOUR HEART. I ALSO KNOW YOU WILL HAVE BAGS OF MEMORIES, KEEP THEM CLOSE AND CHERISH THEM FOR YEARS TO COME. I LOVE YOU MARY BOOTH
Dear Jennifer and family,
Thank you for sharing your heart with those of us who have been watching and praying with you through your messages each day. Please accept my heartfelt sympathy. I am a MITI mom who is re-reading Fueled by Faith, again. Know that I will keep you in my prayers throughout this coming year. God bless you with His choicest blessings.
The grace and faith in which your family has handled this very personal experience is inspirational to me. Thank you for sharing this testimony. I am so sorry for your loss.
Molly (Consiglio) Mundt
Bless you all. Thank God for your strength.
Dear Jennifer, I really don't have the words to express all that I am feeling as I have just read your last posting. This journey with you has been so awesome, first and foremost, because very few people could have done what you have done. Perhaps, for you, it has been therapy and comforting -- sharing your heart and thoughts with others. From our end, it has been the richest blessing, to see how you and Wayne and your family have undertaken this journey. You have given us precious new insights into the journey of a child of God to his Heavenly Home.
I am totally confident that the perfect and precious peace of God that has sustained you in this journey will continue to be experienced even as the tears of a temporary goodbye are shed.
As Bill & Gloria Gaither so beautifully wrote in song: "...At the side of a saint there's rejoicing, for life can't be sealed in a tomb!"
Robbie Nelson - Stonecroft Ministries
Home Free! No more hunger, no more thirst, no tears - "For the Lamb at the center of the throne will be their shepherd; He will lead them to springs of living water. And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes."
Revelation 7:17
I am both grieving and rejoicing with you all at the same time.
Know that my prayers won't stop.
I'll leave you with this thought from Carolyn Arends' song "My First Christmas":
You all will miss him so, but if he could he would let you know..."this is my first Christmas..."
"First time to hear the angels sing
Glory, hallelujah to the risen king
And a holy night is what this is
‘Cause this is my first Christmas
This is my first Christmas'"
Jane
Dearest Jennifer,
Robbie Nelson said it so eloquently: "Perhaps, for you, it has been therapy and comforting -- sharing your heart and thoughts with others. From our end, it has been the richest blessing, to see how you and Wayne and your family have undertaken this journey." I have marvelled at your strength throughout this ordeal. I have raced to my computer everyday for the last few weeks waiting for updates, and every one has been as encouraging as the last. You are a beautiful spirit, used by God to inspire His people. Thank you so much for all of the ways that you have blessed the body of Christ. Today, Wayne is absent from his earthly body, but present with the Lord of his salvation. Can you imagine the reception that is going on in heaven? I thank God for the love the two of you shared and the memories that you will cherish for the rest of your life. I will continue to pray for you and your sons, that the peace of God that passeth all understanding, will continue to guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus our Lord.
In Jesus' Name,
Tonya
Jennifer, You and your family are amazing. Thank you so much for sharing Wayne's Homegoing with us. I've never met you, but Wayne has time after time been a blessing to me and my family. I won't soon forget the pleasure of hearing that deep southern voice on the phone...."Becky, Wayne Dean". He was always such an encourager, especially when we went through a difficult sports related issue with our son. He always had the big picture in mind. I've wept daily in sorrow and in joy since I found out just a week ago how close Wayne was to going Home. Last night at our son's football banquet, one of the boys read from Psalms 73. I immediately thought of Wayne.
Psalms 73:23-28 "Yet I am always with You; You hold my right hand. You guide me with Your counsel, and afterwards you will take me up to glory. Whom do I have in heaven but You? And I desire nothing on earth but You. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart, my portion forever.....But as for me, God's presence is my good...." The subtitle of this blog speaks of "Wayne's progress". He certainly has.
Praying you and the boys will be wrapped in His peace,
Becky Thomas
(Greg's wife, Bre's, Nathan's and Jonathan's mom)
Just getting home and seeing your post. I'm so sorry. Just this morning I was praying for you all - and I thought of the song that God used to minister to me after my father's death. The song by Truth - "If You Could See Me Now"
"Our prayers have all been answered
I finally arrived
The healing that has been delayed
Has now been realized
No one's in a hurry
There's no schedule to keep
We're all enjoying Jesus
Just sitting at His feet
Chorus:
If you could see me now
I'm walking streets of gold
If you could see me now
I'm standing tall and whole
If you could see me now
You'd know I'd seen His face
If you could see me now
You'd know the pain is erased
You wouldn't want me to ever leave this place
If you could only see me now.
My light and temporary trials
Have worked out for my good
To know it brought Him glory
When I misunderstood
Though we've had our sorrows
They can never compare
What Jesus has in store for us
No language can share
Chorus repeats
You wouldn't want me to ever leave this place
If you could only see me now
If you could only see me now..."
There is joy for Wayne and sorrow for your family, because we can only imagine how you will miss him.
Thank you for letting us walk with you - and see what faith looks like in the face of death - oh for God's grace, to live and die well, as Wayne has.
Psalm 116:15, "Precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of his saints."
Praying for your family,
Melanie Raynor
"TODAY WAYNE DEAN WAS BORN"... fitting words...not an ending, but a beginning..."moving day"...not goodbye...but "until". Sorrow here...Celebration there...suffering and rejoicing this side...Glory at Home...waiting here...eternity's edge...face to face...pressing on...Faith...Sight...
You are loved...
Jennifer, I am at once happy for Wayne and so sad for you and your sons. I look forward to meeting him in heaven. It becomes more a place I am homesick for every time someone special goes home. God bless you and keep you in His awesome comfort. Thank you for your loyalty to The King during this difficult period in your life. You are truly an example of what closeness to God can take you through.
You will be in my prayers for a long time to come. Karen Wheat
Jennifer
I have been praying Psalm 23 for Wayne, you, and your sons for days.
I will continue to pray it for you all.
Betty Van Horn
Oklahoma
What a day that will be
when my Jesus I shall see,
when I look upon his face
the one who saves me by his grace,
when he takes me by the hand
and leads me to the promised land
what a day, a glorious day, that will be!
What a glorious homecoming it is! And yet what heartache for the loss of a beautiful life.
God, surround this family in their moment of loss and brokeness. Let them find comfort in you and in those with whom you have surrounded them. Let them know and cling to your promises in the days to come. Amen.
Bless all your hearts and souls! it's awesome that he gets to be with his lord and savior and now is one of the angels watching over you. Still praying for you and your family.
Samantha Maloney
from Blue Springs MO
Bless all your hearts and souls! it's awesome that he gets to be with his lord and savior and now is one of the angels watching over you. Still praying for you and your family.
teri maloney, samantha's mom
Jennifer and family: I am so pleased and happy for Wayne, but so sad for us. We will miss Wayne's grace and his spirit, yet we find comfort that he is free of his earthsuit and born to life everlasting.
God's grace and peace continue to be with you all.
Bill Prather
Jennifer,Brantley,Kennedy,Stinson,
I feel for you all, I'm torn between two emotions, like all the others. Happy for Wayne, but sorry he is gone and the saddness you have to feel. Jennifer, again thank you for sharing such a personal time in your family's life. It kept us in touch with Wayne's condition and let us know how to pray. Plus, your postings have been so precious and a blessing. Your postings and others comments have made me think on different things. They have really made me think on heaven, in a real way. We know it is a better place, but we don't think about it in depth. I have the last few days and was excited for Wayne. Boy's you have been such a help and support for your Mom and Dad, helping where needed. I think that is neat to give of yourselves, like that. Me and Sterling will keep praying for you guys.
Donna Farber
Jennifer -- what a celebration that is going on in heaven as Wayne is welcomed home. What a blessing you have been over these past weeks as you have shared so intimately with us ... our prayers continue to hold you and your sons before God's throne as He continues to hold you safely in His arms.
Our love - Mary and Burley
May the Spirit of the Living God fall afresh on each of you. I pray the Spirit of the Lord will hoover over each of you dear ones and His presence, His very presence will fill the place where you are as it fills your souls. May He continue to saturate you with His peace.
My prayers continue with you all as we celebrate Wayne's Homegoing and as we lift you and your sons to the Lord to provide continued comfort, strength and power. May His face shine upon you, may He be gracious unto you and fill you with peace, power, and His presence. May Jesus Christ be praised because He is Lord!
With love,
Kay Walker
Dean Family,
God Bless You. Our thoughts and prayers are with you. Heaven is a much richer place today as it welcomed one outstanding man.
The families of Tony Wrisinger and Brian Johnston at Vision Sports
Dear one,
Praying for you as you face all the details ahead--that God's peace would continue to help you through these days.
Love,
Janet Mc
So, so sorry for your loss. As I sit here and cry, I feel the need to thank you and your family for sharing your spiritual journey with the rest of us. You are truly special and blessed.
My prayers will continue to be with you all.
Debra Morgan
Monroeville, AL
Jennifer and Sons,
I have followed closely your journey and Wayne's. God has used Wayne's homecoming for so many of us and I thank you for letting us travel this road with you. I can never express how you all have blessed my heart and encouraged my faith in our Lord. I have printed this entire journey and it will be on file when and if I should ever need strengthening in a storm. May God be especially close with His comforting arms folded around you and your sons. May you soon fly with the eagles.
Janice Pridgen
We have the message of Wayne's blessed release and transition and the Lord's word of assurance, John 11:26. We await word of plans for a service of special recognition and memory.
Our love,
O.V. & Janice
Blessings dear sister. You have been in my prayers over and over. I celebrate with you the LIFE Wayne stepped into today. What a brave daughter of the King. You will remain in my prayers as you continue to press on in this life. What a joy when we all join Wayne and our Lord together in eternity and see Him face to face and know as we are known. Halleluia!
So many inspired, loving words have been shared here - I look forward every day to reading the inspiration found herein. I will miss this sight as much as our dear brother in Christ. God has shown me so much - names here that I recognize and used to know - I have missed so many and life is too short. I praise God for opening my eyes through your words and your peaceful sorrow - heavenly peace.
Jennifer and family, Words seem so inadequate during these times. Please know that the entire Stone family has you in our thoughts and prayers. God is so faithful....He's never failed us yet....I'm sure He'll carry you through these hard times. Our love, Lana & Jim and all the Stones
Brantley, Stinson, Kennedy
You guys our in my thoughts and prayers.
-Billy Beyer
Jennifer,
All I can think is that Wayne and Roger are already best friends, sharing laughter as they compare notes about you. Roger is hearing all about your boys and excited to meet the man with whom your life has been so blessed.
Joy in heaven today. Prayers for your memories and longings. We will not stop holding you close.
Jenn and Greg James
Dear Jennifer,
I know that you write poetry. So do I. I would like to share with you this poem that I wrote for a friend of mine who had also lost her husband.
MY COMFORT
The chain of love
That surrounds my life
Is missing a link today.
The angel of death
Came in mercy and love
And carried my Husband away.
The line death draws
In the sands of time
May keep us far apart.
But it has no power
To destroy the memories
That fill my mind and heart.
From this day forward
I will never, ever
Take life for granted again.
Like a final gift,
A lesson hard learned
By the death of this...
my husband...my friend.
Mary (Horner) Cossiboom
Paducah, Ky.
"Blessed are those who die in you, Lord,from now on. They will rest from all their toils and trials; for their good deeds follow them!" Revelation 14:13 The Lord gave me this verse in my quiet time today Jennifer. He had me praying for Wayne many nights the last two weeks as I followed the blog site. What an honor it has been to pray and watch the care of Jesus, our Great Physician, tenderly, peacefully, take Wayne to his Heavenly Home. "Those who believe in You will live, even though they die, and those who live and believe in You will never die. John 11:25-26
"Those we love are with the Lord, and the Lord has promised to be with us. If they are with Him, and He is with us, they can't be far away." Peter Marshall
Praise the Lord for His faithfulness to you all - past, present, and future. He will be with you every step of the way. I pray that the next few days, though hard, will also be a time of celebration and laughter for a life well lived. Know that we are all lifting the four of you up before the throne of grace constantly. Imagine - today at 1:00 Wayne saw the face of Jesus!!
Love and long distance hugs,
Debbie
Ft. Smith, AR
Comforted to comfort.......little did I know when my heart was touched by the scripture in this mornings devotion that it would be so fitting for this new "birth" of Wayne. IICorinthians 1:1-11. Having walked this path I will trust that you will take time to grieve as you celebrate "new life" I think I hear the Heavenly Choir now....God Bless!
Jennifer and boys:
Your last comments on your journey with Wayne through the valley of the shadow of death were so profound. I know when I have to sit with a loved one, I will be lifted up and encouraged by the memory of your words and insight.
I feel sad that you had to say goodbye to Wayne so soon, but have a firm belief that God will lead you on to higher ground until you meet again.
My prayers are with you and your family. Jesus, they need you now to carry them through!
In Christ,
Charlene Hodge
Dear Jen,
What a gracious God to give you the gift of many years with such a wonderful husband, father, and friend. And time to prepare together, time for remembering together, time to say goodbye. Too soon gone, but waiting for you to spend eternity with him.Thank you for sharing it all with us. Please keep the blog on for a while, so we can benefit from all the comforting support that love has brought you. Wayne and our loving Father and Savior are surely sharing their pleasure over how you all have come through this. You done good, Gal.
Love,
Barb
"to live is Christ and to die is gain" --"a man was caught up into the third heaven...into Paradise and heard inexpressible words" --and now Wayne is there too, praising our Lord Jesus.
It's so hard to walk thru the valley of the shadow of death. Please know that we will continue praying for you and your boys.
Please give a hug to your folks and sisters for me. Love, Claudia
I am a stranger. I got your link from someone because my husband has been diagnosed with brain lesions. No cancer at this point.
Please know that God will see you though this, as the days grow dim and your grief swells, The Lord is there holding you every step of the way.
Linda
St. Louis MO
I was sitting at our church office waiting for my prayer partner Maria at 1 pm today...Maria was one of 5 women I brought with me to the Sacramento Conference you taught 2 years ago...so we both prayed for you and Wayne and your family...Not knowing he had already made the journey home...
What an honor to walk with you and all these wonderful ppl who have also walked along side of you on your journey...
I did go to your website and purchase the book Fueled by Faith.
I am looking forward to reading it as I always do when I read your insights and teachings.
My heart is curiously rejoicing for Wayne and your ability to accept that...but also sad and very aware of the change this brings to you and your sons and friends and loved ones whom will share this time with you...
The Lord is faithful and trustworthy...so I do not worry...
"When we Trust We do not Worry"
Love to you and your loved ones...
Kerri
The sun has risen once again in Kuwait. Knowing that Wayne has gone "home" at last to be with His Father in Heaven makes today's sun shine brighter! Oh how my heart is heavy for your loss, Jennifer and how it rejoices to imagine Wayne's Homecoming party! I will continue to keep you and your sons in my prayers. You have blessed me so much. Just yesterday my husband asked me why I have suddenly become more attentive to him (something he always longs for). Jennifer, know that you and Wayne have been a tremendous blessing to me and my husband through the postings you've written. I have been able to realize the "gift" I have in my own husband. God has used Wayne until his last breath for His glory! God bless you and know that I will continue to pray for each of you from my home in the desert! Love & peace, Sheryll Mairza
sheryll105@hotmail.com
May His Spirit enfold you in His love, Jennifer. Your name, although I have been praying faithfully for you, Wayne and the boys, came forcefully to mind during my worship time this morning. It was before I turned on the computer. Know that you are prayed for and know a continuance of the peace that God has so lovingly been giving you through this time. Still pryaing.
Deb Weaver
I have been printing off many of your entries for co-workers and friends. I can't help thinking this journey should be shared with everyone who walks through the valley of the shadow of death with a loved one.
Jennifer,
I can only imagine what a birthday reception Wayne received on his arrival home! You and your family have been on hearts, minds, and in prayer during this time. You have touched folks you'll never meet on this side of heaven, for that, thank you. You are a lovely woman and I will keep you and your family in prayer.
God bless from Hallsville Missouri where you touched many of us.
Wayne was a joy to work with. And though no words can express the saddness I feel for your family and friends I pray you know that the words you have shared in the last weeks have been a blessing to so many.
Cindy
Missouri Baptist Children's Home
I'm so sorry.. At least he's with God now :) I'm sure you can take comfort in that..
Jennifer,
I am praying for your family at this time. You are a blessing of love and hope for many. I met you at a conference here in California a few years back and was deeply touched by our conversation and have kept in touch with you and your family and all things going on through emails and such. We know now that Wayne is dancing with the Lord and awaiting your arrival. God bless you all in this time. May your days be filled with Gods love and goodness and light.
Robin Crist
Sacramento California
Revelations From The Heart
Prayers have been extended to even the smallest of universities on the West coast. We are praying for you. Brantley, I love you and pray that the peace of Christ may be with you as you mourn and grieve the passing of your father. This earth is not our final destination - thanks be to God.
-Danielle
Jennifer. These are the times when writers are at a loss for words...Your family is in my heart and prayers. Thank you for your example, my AWSA friend.
Jennifer, my heart is knit to yours during this time of change. May the Comforter comfort you and your sons.
Karen O'Connor
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